Bloomberg Is Hiding All The Bodega Junk Food So You Can’t See Or Eat It
You know what is really the worst? When you’re really jonesing for some crap food, like Pringles or Nutella (or Nutella on Pringles!!!!), and you’re looking around the bodega for food, and it turns out that the Pringles are on the top shelf. And then you’re like, “Screw it, I can’t reach the Pringles. I’ll just have this banana that’s within arm’s reach.”
This, according to Mayor Michael Bloomberg, is the thought process that will keep us safe from obesity! This is also why he’s launched the Shop Healthy program in Bronx neighborhoods suffering the highest rates of obesity, in which 80 supermarkets and bodegas have voluntarily placed healthier items, like fresh produce and water, on prime shelf space formerly occupied by junk food.
The New York Daily News reports that the stores will also remove ads selling junk food from their windows, as well as stock more low-sodium foods. And some report that it does well for their business: after shopowner Radame Perez moved vegetables closer to the door, he found that people bought more vegetables. “It makes good business sense. Fresh produce sells,” he told the Daily News.
Don’t worry, says Bloomberg, for unlike his liberty-stealing soda ban, this is a completely voluntary program for store owners. Just don’t expect them to go away once you’ve said “no” the first time around. ““We like to think of it as they haven’t said yes yet,” said Deputy Mayor Linda Gibbs, as she menacingly swung her billy club. (This has to be the happiest extortionary measure ever made!)
And where does the junk food go? Why, it goes somewhere where you can’t see them. In fact, don’t worry too much about it. Pringles is living upstate at the happy farm.