Josie Smith-Malave Has At Least One Fan, And It’s Don King

 

This is legendary boxing promoter Don King. Don is known for things like promoting boxing matches, having hair that looks constantly startled, and being friends with Mike Tyson. In short, Don King is known for being a professional crazy person. Suddenly, his heartfelt plea to #SaveChefJosie on his favorite show, Top Chef, makes a lot of sense.

Somehow, through what might be witchcraft and black magic, Grub Street interviewed the creator of The Rumble In The Jungle to find out why he threw his considerable support behind the oft-maligned Josie Smith-Malave in Last Chance Kitchen. We don’t know how they got this interview. We don’t know why they knew Don King was such a passionate member of Team Josie. But no matter the reason, they spoke to him, and we have learned these things.

Don King fell in love with Josie over her Elimination-worthy fried chicken, which he has not eaten:

Eating her fried chicken, they tell me, is a religious experience. It’s something awesome.

Don King thinks Josie is America:

Chef Josie’s team makes America’s dreams. You know what I’m saying? This is what you’ve have to do. There ain’t no I in team. That’s T-E-A-M; that’s on the B-E-A-M. If you deal with that — whether it’s I-I-I, we, the me-me-me, or the we and us — that’s when you start to lose sight of the forest for the trees. So we may get chef Josie, I’ll make it come together, and in so doing, we’ll open up and serve the hearts and the stomachs of all Americans; every creed, race, color, and religion.

Don King thinks that Josie’s elimination from a reality television show is a civil rights atrocity, almost on par with the injustice faced by Rosa Parks and the civil rights protesters in Birmingham:

I think she should have the opportunity to win Top Chef. Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. That’s what Dr. Martin Luther King said. She was kicked unjustly off the show, so let us rectify that, not by pointing fingers and blame and accusing this one and that one, but by going to the Twitter and sending out the tweets, and going to the text and sending out the texts. You know, let’s see chef Josie. That’s all we want, all the viewers everywhere to cast the vote, cast that franchisement, let us have the enjoyment of chef Josie and her Gospel Bird, her fried chicken, her cooking.

Don King said this string of nonsense words about Josie:

Well, America means a lot to me, and chef Josie is a part of Americana, you know, and these are the people who count: They say what they mean, mean with they say. Because of this, sometimes what they say and how they say it is not taken they way people may like it. Shakespeare says it even better: “Trifles light as air are to the jealous confirmations strong as proofs of holy writ.”

Don King loves Josie so much, that he wrote a song about her:

Chef Josie is the people’s chef
A master of culinary art
For the people
By the people
And of the people
Her food is Ambrosia
For the masses
And the classes
And her magic lies
In her cooking ties
To the people
Save Chef Josie
Save Chef Josie
It’s the American way

Slow claps all around for our colleagues at Grub Street. They deserve an award for this brilliant piece of journalism.

[Grub Street]

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