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Last Call: This Alleged Top Chef Sex Scandal Is Most Scandalous

Miami Herald: In the Top Chefiest Top Chef scandal ever to come out of Andy Cohen’s culinary thunderdome, Season 5 contestant Jeff McInnis allegedly abandoned his wife and infant daughter to run away with Janine “The Hot Aussie” Booth from the current season of Top Chef: New Orleans. Sorry to whomever was developing that story as a killer Top Chef fanfic.

Today Show: Bacon lowers your sperm count! Bacon lowers your sperm count! Bacon lowers your sperm count! (Everybody freak out.)

Southern Foodways Alliance: A video of the Pie vs. Cake Lincoln-Douglas Debate from this year’s Southern Foodways Symposium is posted in its entirety on the interwebs. We’ll be having a viewing party with popcorn (ironically), if you wanna come hang.

Eater Chicago: Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel declared today Paul Kahan Day in Chicago. We’ll be celebrating with a plethora of cured meats. (We don’t have to worry about things like sperm count. Uteri, FTW.)

Huffington Post: The Doritos Locos Taco at Taco Bell just surpassed $1 billion in sales, prompting the company to hire some 15,000 new employees. Stoner economy is officially functioning better than the regular ass economy.

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