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Tonight In Food TV: We Wish Graham Elliot Drove Our Childhood School Bus

He’s like Ms. Frizzle, except instead of sciencey wonders, he provides gastronomic ones, and instead of having a sweet pet reptile named Liz, he has Gordon Ramsay. (Joe Bastianich is Arnold in this parallel.)

On tonight’s MasterChef, the home cooks enter their first group challenge, surrounded by these 300 obnoxious school children, who — lo and behold! — will be their judges.

“Our fate’s in their little, tiny, creepy hands,” one contestant accurately points out.

Check out a sneak peek of tonight’s episode below, and pray that Graham doesn’t take that hat off the entire two-hour-long episode.

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