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WATCH: Duck Dynasty Has A Cookbook, We’re Disappointed It’s Not Actually Written By Ducks

Mariella:  Do you want to write about Duck Dynasty’s cook book?

me:  I know nothing about Duck Dynasty
so yeah, I’ll take it

Once upon a time, there was a large, bearded family in the backwoods of Louisiana, who made a fortune off of duck whistles. Somehow this led to a reality television series, and America fell in love with their beards or something? We’re not sure. We can see why America would love those beards, especially in the month of No-Shave November, but we’re not sure if that’s the reason they’re popular. Our theory is that they glue beards to ducks.

Through some pop culture mechanism, the Duck Dynasty family is renowned enough for their matriarch, Kay Robertson, to publish a cookbook and hawk it on the TODAY Show. (That bird pun was unintentional.)

Could someone explain this cultural phenomenon to us? We’re puzzled.

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