Remember the real-life hamburglar from this week, aka our favorite robber of all time? He followed a delivery guy into a Five Guys in D.C., made himself a burger, and then cleaned up after himself nicely. Gotta love a respectful burglar. The Washington Post reported that D.C. Crime Solvers have offered a $1,000 for information that could lead to the hamburglar’s arrest, but that’s not nearly as enticing as what competitor chain Wayback Burger is offering. If the thief turns himself in, the chain will give him free burgers for an entire year.
Come out, come out, wherever you are, #hamburglar https://t.co/0BKdtXa4RY
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 12, 2016
The president of Wayback Burger said in a statement:
As you may be aware, there is a gentleman who broke in and made himself a burger at another restaurant brand last month in the D.C. area and is still at large. To that gentleman, I’d like to say that we all make mistakes – from committing this illegal act to your choice of burgers. I strongly encourage you to do the right thing and turn yourself in right away…After you take accountability for your actions, Wayback Burgers will give you FREE burgers for one year. It’s not too late to turn it around based on what you did. We’ll be keeping an eye on this story.
Funny! At first…but “keeping an eye on it” is a gross, gross understatement. The chain has gone on a Kanye West-style Twitter rant, incredulous that their offer has not led to the hamburglar’s arrest:
He’s still out there!!! #hamburglar @InsideEdition pic.twitter.com/5WFlNg77eg
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
bro, you can’t hide under that fedora. confess. #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
turn. yourself. in. #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
Seriously? Free burgers for a year man #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
this is the worst #hamburglar yet
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
maybe we’ll throw in a fry or two #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
And then it gets crazier:
Does anyone know if the #hamburglar has a @Twitter account? We’ll DM him
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
fine we’ll throw in a milkshake #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
you have to be hungry, right #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
And then they start to resemble frat guy “u up?” texts
um hello #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
oh so you only like to come out at night huh #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
so you wanted burgers at 3 am but you don’t want them now #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
And then they try to get him with memories of a funny video.
we gon’ find you, we gon’ find you pic.twitter.com/uYjOuek4Rj
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
Wow.
Alright, we’ll be here #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
waiting…
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
patiently…
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
#hamburglar you there???
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
we see how it is #hamburglar
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
guess we will check back at 3 am …
— Wayback Burgers (@waybackburgers) April 13, 2016
Hamburglar, for your own safety, might we advise you DON’T take them up on this offer?
[Image via Instagram @waybackburgers]
[H/T First We Feast]
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