We Nominate John Kasich to be the New Host of ‘Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives’

Dana EisenbergApr 25th, 2016, 12:22 pm
 

If this whole politics thing doesn’t work out for the current crop of presidential candidates, pretty much all of them could have careers in the food industry. We’re not exactly sure where their campaigns took a sharp, sharp turn but suddenly this election feels as though it’s mainly about food, and that we’re deciding who to vote for based on who knows how to eat pizza appropriately (neither John Kasich nor Donald Trump).  Only one of the candidates can become president, so we’d like to suggest a backup plan for Kasich- becoming the new host of Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives.

If Guy Fieri ever gets bored driving around the country and eating some of the best burgers and fried food around, Kasich would be an excellent replacement as host for his Food Network show known to its fans as “Triple D.” No candidate’s food doings have been so well documented as Kasich’s. Even today, in the midst of the Kasich-Cruz alliance announcement, we cannot stop watching him eat at a diner in Philadelphia (and he can barely stop eating long enough to answer questions). The guy would be perfect on the whoe. We’ll even forgive him for the pizza with a fork and knife thing (which may have been staged anyway) because his insane Bronx deli experience was EVERYTHING. Remember this?

 

 

Gothamist also uncovered this video of Kasich ordering food. He’s hanging out with the locals, asking them questions about how often they eat at the restaurant, and cracking jokes that only half-land. If this isn’t an audition tape, I don’t know what is:

 

While we’re at it, we’d also like to recommend that Hillary Clinton become a food blogger. She could write a regular column on how to look like a complete tourist in a state where you’re already a resident and recommending Hillstone in every city. Bernie Sanders could take over Dan Pashman‘s Cooking Channel show You’re Eating it Wrong. He would school everyone on the appropriate way to eat every single type of food like a real New Yorker.

Ted Cruz could teach a class on how to roll Matzah with a musical component. Or, there could be an entire channel with just this video on a loop 24 hours a day:

And there’s nothing more we’d like to read than a cookbook by Donald Trump called Something out of Nothing: The Perfect Trump Steak and Trump Wine Dinner That Many People Will Say Is The Best Steak and Wine Dinner They’ve Ever Had.

 

[image via screengrab]

Related:

Donald Trump’s 700 Acre Lie about His Wine and Other Food Related Untruths

Have a tip we should know? tips@mediaite.com

Filed Under: